Saturday, December 26, 2009

These Frail Hands

I just spent the past hour or so washing dishes. My hands are slowly becoming less like raisins, although they still have the complete softness of constant exposure to soap and water. My fingers glide across the keys of my computer as I type, I feel as if they barely touch the keys I intend to enter, less concerned about what to write and more intent on slipping over and across.

I take for granted these two hands of mine. They are capable of doing so much, and yet I rarely thank them or give them any attention. Not that I should go around looking at them and saying oh thank you hands for being great at opening doors and throwing frisbees and driving stick shift cars and writing words on paper and holding other hands. But I think I should at least be grateful to them for all I've put them through.

For instance, four years ago I was playing tug-of-war with some friends. I stood in the front of my line of eight people, wrapped the rope once around my right hand, and waiting for the "go!" Needless to say my hand broke instantly. 5th metacarpal completely broken, 4th with fractures. It healed quickly, and I am more or less able to use it as if it were brand new. There are times when I remember it's not the 'ol perfect hand it used to be, but it does well.

Later that year, I had a scooter accident where I badly scarred that same hand. Blood dripped everywhere, but scabs formed in a matter of hours and slowly fell away over the next couple weeks. You have to deliberately look at it to see any scarring. I've also been bitten by a stupid chihuahua, sliced a finger open with a pocket knife, and so on and so forth.

For some reason, in all they've been through (mainly my right hand), I've still been told every now and then that I have beautiful hands. I suppose that's a good compliment to get, in fact I'd much rather hear that than have someone come up to me and say wow, your hands are quite ugly. I won't complain of course, I like compliments, and in all conceited honesty, I agree.

But what of my hands?

Do I protect them and do my best to keep them beautiful, clean and well trimmed? Or do I go out into this world and get them banged up, dirty and scarred? I can't exactly think the right way to go is the former. I can't think there would be any reason for me to stay clean and dainty. That's right, I used the word dainty. No, no I don't think so. So be ready world, my hands are going to grab you by the horns.

Or something like that.

And these frail hands, they tremble as they pen perhaps their last. And these weak words, can never say what cannot be surpassed. I need your love, and most of all I want to feel your peace. I need your love, let everything that you are not decrease.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

The Greatest Story Ever Told

PLEASE CLICK HERE. (Or click the photo)

Did you visit the link? Because I really think you ought to. You're not going to get any more words out of me that would interest you. All you need is to read where I sent you. And all you need to know is I love my grandparents.

I've heard it said that he wastes nothing, so beautiful to behold, the Author of my hope is writing the greatest story ever told.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

It Was Beautiful

Everyone seems to be flying home for the holidays. Soldiers on leave, dads getting back from business trips, students done with college for the semester; families returning to one another. There is a sense of joy and excitement in the air. An aura of love and good tidings to all.

For myself though, things are different. I am flying away from my family as we speak. Lost somewhere above Arizona or New Mexico at 39000 feet. I do not know what I will be doing this Christmas day. Usually I am at home with my family opening presents, eating food, and resting. Not this year. Maybe I'll be working. Maybe I'll be watching another family celebrate the joy of Christmas together.

The choice was my own. My work said I could have the time off. They said I could take this week and be away its entirety. They gave me an awkward look when I told them I'd rather it be the week before. Most people did. Most people were dumbfounded when they heard I wasn't going to be home on Christmas day. I thought it wouldn't make a difference. I thought I'd be fine. I don't think that's going to be the case.

Yet I wouldn't change my decision for the world. If I were asked to choose again I would do the exact same thing. I wouldn't even think twice about it. I wouldn't change one single minute, not even one single second.

It was too beautiful.

Pictures looking back, just snapshots of the past cannot compare to feeling what we felt, through anything that came that You were there.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

All That Is Good

I'm sitting on the couch I should be currently sleeping in. Sheets are pulled back, ready for my feet to crawl underneath, and the pillow is all too inviting. They can wait for a couple minutes though, as right now the writer's urge has hit. And you know when that happens there's no stopping it. Shortening it maybe, but no complete cessation.

I had the wonderfullest of nights tonight over at my friend's house. We ate homemade tacos, dipped chips in homemade salsa, and ate tacos until our bellies were full. My dearest "A", seen above, decided her tummy didn't want tacos and so she stuck with chicken nuggets and ketchup. A fine choice if you ask me, even if her tummy still ended up not wanting them as well. She's been recovering from being sick, so hopefully sleep will help her out for a full day tomorrow.

Before her sleep though, we had the chance to read a book about puppies and snow. I must say she rather enjoyed it, her brother "ZC" did as well. After reading a book to her she'll always ask me to read it again, which always amuses me. I suppose it's the simple things in life that children are most fond of, and repetition isn't such a bad thing if it's beautiful. But I got to read a chapter of a book for "ZC", and we were all content.

Life's been like that recently, complete contentment. Alright so maybe not utterly bona fide 100% complete, but darn-near enough to where I'm not complaining. It's the simple things I'm finding hope in. The simple things that bring a smile to my face. And life has been full of them recently.

Where does the misunderstanding come from, demanding that we be outstanding and then some? Perfection never was a requirement, although some might say we desired it. So then for times when things get old I might get cynical.

Friday, November 20, 2009

Prologue II

I finally have a day off where I can sit and do nothing and fully enjoy it. This past week has been full of work work work, and even though I'm super excited to be making money once again and realizing I'm going to have a steady income, I'm glad for the peace and quiet. For the time being I'm listening to Soapbox Symphony along with the rain that is falling outside. It's raining steadily. Not a downpour or a sprinkle, but a nice consistent waterfall.

I've missed the rain. Having grown up in southern California I would always be appreciative of any rain we'd get. There would be instances when it would rain for a few days at a time, but with the absence of seasons there comes an inconsistent appearance of the sweet liquid.

Yesterday afternoon the clouds started rolling in. The humidity was bearable, but you could feel a change in the air, a difference was certainly presented. It took a while for the rain to finally decide it was ready. I was sitting eating dinner and I saw lightning strike in the distance. When I walked outside I could hear the thunder, see the lightning, and finally feel the first drops fall to the ground. I made it to my place of residence for the night without any problems, I was only a couple miles away to be honest, and propped up my umbrella above my open car door to get some of my belongings inside without getting them or myself too wet. As I lay on the couch ready for bed I could hear a steady downfall, and I was very content. 

Right now I sit on the same couch I fell asleep on, and look behind me at the consistency of raindrops pitter-pattering on the red deck. The oak tree above it catches as much of the drops as it can, soaking up as much precipitation as it can in order to stretch its roots deeper and deeper into the ground. It receives life from this water, and it lives in comfort knowing it has a long life ahead of it to live.

I feel like this oak tree. I may be a much younger version of it, but I get another vivid description of how my life is supposed to be lived right now. For me, life is happening all around me, and I've been called to sit and bask in the blessings that surround me. I'm supposed to take it all in, and become like a tree firmly planted by streams of water. The life is here, and I accept it fully, without hesitation or caution.

Let it rain.

In perfect orbit they have circled. As the light of many worlds falls softly on their skin. And days here pass like minutes. One moment of brilliant daylight will shift into the next. A flash of dark behind some distant lost moon. And then it is over. Like the pause before waking. Sleep is replaced by light, and life, and hope. It is the light of one far away sun that has beckoned them to leave and the hope of home that has lifted them from slumber. The hope that though the dark may come, the sun also rises.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Prologue I

I feel like this is just the beginning. The precursor to what is going to turn out to be the grandest of all adventures. And I'm okay with that, I always have been. It's just that I'm beginning, after being in a whole new place for the past two weeks, to realize that this is it. It's not the warm-up, it's not the stretches, it's game time. I can't be living as if this were just one more step before life truly begins. In a way that's how it's been. Ever since graduating college really.

In college it was simpler though. I had classes I needed to pass, and so that made the wondering how each day was supposed to pan out much easier. In those classes were people who lived in the dorm I was living in, ate in the caf I was eating in, and played the same intramural sports I was playing. Life and relationships just happened. There was always someone you could find who shared a common like or dislike, and as a result you became friends.

Video games kept us awake through ungodly hours of the night, late term papers had the same effect, and at times conversations in the prayer room lasted way too long. Did anyone ever actually pray in there? Maybe that's why they took it away. In any case, strong friendships were forged through these times, as well as broken I'm sure, but not as often. 

Four years have passed since then though. Each of us having lived over a thousand days, over thirty-five thousand hours. At first we stayed close to the city we graduated in. Our friendships were more important than our living arrangements. But as time passed, and the realization that we needed to get our lives in order, we spread out. Cheaper housing was available anywhere over five hundred miles away. Jobs and families had stronger bonds than our desires to stay nearby to one another. 

Maybe we finally started realizing that we needed to live our own lives. We couldn't live vicariously through each other, no matter how hard we tried. And maybe the only way we thought this possible was to move away from the friends we loved, the relationships we built over the past eight years. The closest "friend" I have from college lives 215 miles away, and we haven't even truly spoken since we graduated. The next closest is 900 miles away, and I don't even want to know what mileage category the others fall into.

I suppose what I'm saying is that we're now all out on our own. True life has hit us and we've decided to grab it by the horns and hope the ride ends somewhere enjoyable. We're ready to be held responsible for our actions, we're ready to build more relationships that will last longer than forever. We're ready to dig in our toes and our heels and plant ourselves in the soil that has been eagerly awaiting our arrival since birth. 

Where will our roots go though? Will they only linger among the topsoil and weeds that have no nourishment and only sporadic water? Or will they penetrate deeply into the firmament that longs to be tilled its entire life? It's entirely up to us, but as I said in the beginning I feel like this is the time to do it. It's not up to us to worry about where we will find ourselves tomorrow or next year. It's not up to us to try and change the seasons in our lives or force change that might not be ready to happen. 

Life, as complicated as it may be, is meant to be lived.

But not haphazardly, or lazily. 






Take today, for all it's worth, and live the best way you know how. Just try it. I dare you.

Just off the border of your waking mind. There lies another time where darkness and light are one. And as you tread the halls of sanity, you feel so glad to be unable to go on. I have a message from another time. Godspeed.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

When I Go Out

I'm sitting in the San Antonio public library. And let's just say, it's public. Parents who can't keep their kids under control, allowing them to run and scream through the periodicals. It's frustrating, really. I don't know if I'm more annoyed with that nuisance or with the fact that the wireless doesn't have a strong enough signal for me to connect to the internet consistently. I'm leaning heavily toward the former.

False threats, raised voices, young'uns whining over spilled apple juice that is now permeating the library halls. What can you do right? Find a different library I suppose. One that is peaceful, serene, calm; in all other senses of the word - QUIET. This isn't the place to read a book or study for a midterm. This isn't the place to come and relax.

I think maybe, I'll retreat back to my house.

When I go out I play in the street, I get hit by cars, I make mashed potatoes, I get hit by cars.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

You Probably Shouldn't Move Here

I don't think it's hitting me yet, being away from home. Probably because every time I stop in Arizona my next direction is always West. These trips have always been wonderful. I get to visit with dear friends, eat delicious food, and relax to my heat's content. After that I find myself driving down the 202 W, to the 10 W, 60 W, 91 W, 55 S, 5 S and I'll be home. But tomorrow morning will be different.

No driving toward the sunset, only away from it. The 10 E is calling my name, and it's a road I've never taken before. A road that is probably flat and boring. A road that rambles through Tucson and Juarez, Ozona and Boerne. The destination; known but unknown, visited but foreign.

This destination though, will not be flat and boring. This I know for sure. There will be ups and downs, twists and turns, and I'm sure a lot of "if at first you don't succeed"s. As far as I know I can't prepare myself for it, can't have any idea of what to expect. Am I ready? Let me answer that with another question - what do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?

It's all a mystery right now though. The light is only a few feet in front of me, which isn't always appreciated. I'm hoping this changes soon, only time will tell. Only time will tell.

Well I heard that your state could be sinking, deep into the briny sea, and all of them earthquakes got you thinking, 'bout leaving Californee-ee. There's riots and there's floods and it's smoggy, toxic waste on yonder beach, and all of them hippies down in Santa Cruz are startin' to suck just like a leech.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Anchors Away

The sun sets on what turned out to be yet another beautiful day. I've been having a lot of beautiful days lately. I don't know if it's God trying to bless me during my last few days here, or if I've simply had a string of lucky beautiful days. I'd like to think it's the former, and I actually truly have no other reason to think differently.

One thing is for sure though, and that's the realization that being too busy to write lately has been a good thing. Oh I'm sure I could have found hours between the wee hours of certain mornings, or even passed a quick blog through my phone to appease the multitudes. So let's not get too annoyed with me people, after all, it's not like I'm some uber-comedian anyway (wait, am I expected to be?) - speaking of which, I'm surprised no one commented on my last post on something I found to be utterly humorous.

This past month though, has been one of the best months I've had in recent years. It's truly a combination of all sorts of things. I've found joy in little things. Time with family has lengthened. Friendships have flourished. Adventures, oh the grandest of adventures have been had. There's nothing quite like driving down PCH at midnight, screaming FIF and BS2 songs at the top of your lungs with a dear friend. Really, try to beat that...I didn't think so.

And now I'm not sure exactly when I'll write again, I'm thinking it'll be sometime next week, but not anytime sooner. You see, in less than a week I'll be officially moved out of the state of California. This state that has been my home for my entire life, it's been all I've truly known. I really have no idea of what I'm getting myself into in the state of Texas, but I know it's where I'm supposed to be, at least for the next year...or more. Any doubts I've had about this whole process have slowly but surely been stripped away and removed as the days draw near. I have been constantly reminded of the faithfulness of my Lord, and for that I am forever grateful.

I don't deserve this. Any of it. Yet I'm not called to live in that realization. I'm not called to second-guess blessings of any kind. I suppose that's something to think about; for all of us to think about.

Tune in, tune out, goodbye, goodnight.

Monday, October 5, 2009

I Feel Lucky

Writing on airplane napkins is almost exciting as flying in an airplane. Almost, but not quite. I find it amazing to think that our grandparents grew up just as airplanes were hitting their heyday. My grandpa flew B-52 bombers in WWII - and it's simply fascinating to see how far technology has come since then.

We can jump on a plane and be essentially anywhere in one day. We can have our groceries delivered to our front door and movies streamed to our TVs all for one low monthly fee. And I can be on a plane for a little over an hour, starting in El Salvador and finding myself in Costa Rica with a taxi waiting to take me to my destination.

I'm flying high above Costa Rica right about now, able to see both the Pacific Ocean and the Caribbean Sea. How magnificently beautiful. I'll always be amazed at how vast and beautiful the world we live in is. I know wherever I find myself traveling I will not get bored of the sights, sounds and smells that surround me.

There is too much to be seen, too much to be experienced. And the person in front of me just farted.

So much easier to think that we did this all ourselves. So much easier to let our hearts do what they've felt.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Something Like Laughter

i need a camera.
to freeze this moment in time.
the smile on your face as you come running into my arms.
i never want to let you go.

"tirarme" you shout.
up, up, up you go.
complete confianza.
you couldn't be happier.

days like this don't come as often as they should.
love at its most unadulterated form.
"this is my friend. this is my friend!"
your words couldn't ring truer.

Searching for more than mere lies disguised as dogma, tired eyes tend to wander, seek the light. Create in him a sense of awe that sees Your beauty, let Your splendor flash with blinding light. Standing tall all the aspen trees drink water as the rain falls down like laughter from the sky.

Monday, September 21, 2009


My flight to Costa Rica is on time. I suppose that's a good thing, even if I don't leave for another ten hours. I don't know what to expect these two weeks, but I'm thinking that adds to the adventure and the excitement of it all. It's crazy to think that when I'm back in the states it will be October already, with only three months left of this amazing year. Not only that, but I'll only have sixteen days left in California. I'm hoping and praying I'm able to go to the beach on about 50% of those days, even if it's only for a short time.

I don't know when all of this is going to hit me. I'm not walking timidly around corners though. I'm not looking up to see when the scaffolding is going to come crashing down. I'm not thinking that today or tomorrow will be the day when pretending I'm a super-human finally fails. I know it will be soon though, and I know it's going to hurt. At least I won't be able to say I didn't see it coming.

I'm finding time to remember that one day at a time is the only way life has ever happened for me. I haven't lived two days in a twenty-four hour time period, and I doubt I ever will. So for now, these next ten hours will suffice. Hopefully I'll be able to find a few hours to fall asleep on my first five-hour plane ride, but this too seems highly unlikely.

I wanted to be famous, now I want to take it back.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Where Zero Meets Fifteen

I figure considering I won't be around to post again until October that I should write a little bit. Strange things have been happening lately and I'm not sure how I feel about any of them, but for now I think the best thing to do is to take them with a grain of salt and keep on moving on.

In thirty days I'll officially be on my newest of adventures. I'll have 1,300 miles of open road ahead of me, and after visiting my mechanic yesterday he said to make a point to stop by again before I leave so he can make sure everything in my car is in good condition. This was after getting an oil change yesterday where my car only had half a quart of oil in it when it was supposed to have 4 quarts. I wonder how my scooter is doing...

I can't say that I'm ready to leave, but I know the timing is not in my hands and so I continually step forward in eager anticipation of how things will work out. Sure I could have planned things better, sure I could have waited until everything was in perfect order and the sun was hitting the earth at the perfect angle. But life isn't about waiting, it's about doing. And if everything were perfect, I think I'd be a little scared.

In the meantime I've a lot on my plate. This weekend I'll be up a mountain with a bunch of guys, proving how sportsmanlike and competitive can work together better than oil and water. After that I have a quarterfinal softball game on Monday night, and if we win we'll play an hour later. I jump on a plane headed to Costa Rica immediately afterwards, where I'll be there for a good 11 days. Words cannot express how excited I am about this... When I get back home there will be two weeks left for me in California. 

Goodbye west coast.

What does it matter anyway, thirteen cents or all I own? How can I ever save the world on cup-o-soup and student loans?

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Me Oh My

It's late. No one really knows what time it is. It doesn't truly matter, but in most cases timing is everything. Not here. Time is irrelevant. Mostly because more people are sleeping on the west coast than are awake. 


I've been slacking lately. In most areas of life. I haven't been spending my time wisely, and it shows. At least to me it does. I'll find myself in grooves that were never meant to be plowed, knowing how necessary it is to swerve violently to escape the deep divots. Slow won't cut it. 

Rapid change. 
Abrupt movement.

There's something happening in the sky...I recall that I'm yours now I'm feeling fine.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Far, Far Away

I'll start off by saying I wish I had a camera. I should also mention that I wish I didn't have to buy my sister a camera because I lost hers. I could then write about how I have no money in my bank account and bills are due, but I am not writing today to complain. Not at all.

I just got back home from being gone for eleven days. In order to make some quick cash I agreed to driving to North Dakota and Wisconsin to help deliver mattresses for a small country based out of Southern California. My delivery trip looked something like this:

Day 1: Orange County to Las Vegas, NV: 255 miles
Day 2: Las Vegas to Idaho Falls, ID: 664 miles
Day 3: Idaho Falls to Dickinson, ND: 680 miles
Day 4: Dickinson to Kenmare, ND: 239 miles, 4 deliveries
Day 5: Kenmare to Minot, ND: 225 miles, 5 deliveries
Day 6: Minot to Bismarck, ND: 215 miles, 7 deliveries
Day 7: Bismarck to Menominee, MI: 733 miles
Day 8: Menominee to Green Bay, WI: 57 miles, 1 delivery

We were supposed to take one truck and have two drivers to split the driving time. But there were too many deliveries that were needed so we had no choice but to take two trucks. Of course I found this out on the day we were supposed to leave. I wasn't expecting to drive 3,000 miles in 8 days, but let me tell you, along with the deliveries it came out to be very exhausting.

The fun part though, was traveling to states I had never been to before and meeting many very good-natured and amicable people. Starting in California, I went to Nevada, Utah, Idaho, Wyoming, Montana, North Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michigan.

The people were truly friendly, as I mentioned, and it made me smile knowing that at whatever house we'd be delivering to there would be a smile to greet us. And this was the case. Sure, there was an instance where I customer became quite irate with the other person I was working with, but that's another story in itself. And it could have been easily avoided.

All in all, I'm very glad I was able to go on such a trip, even if I haven't spent a day lately without wondering why in the world I feel exhausted before noon.

I still wish I had a camera.

Can you hear the bells are ringing...can you hear the voices singing...I know that one day soon a song shall rise. You'll hear it with the sleep still in your eyes.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Beautiful America

Quickly now. 
We mustn't wake the neighbors. 
Bags packed and ready to go. 
Step silently out of the house.
The sun has yet to rise. 

My time left in California is getting shorter and shorter, and when I look at it I come to the realization that it's fully out of my hands. I'll be passing through nine states in the next nine days. Thankfully, I'll be making money most of the time, as the whole purpose of this trip is work-related. It amazes me how quickly opportunities arise when necessities present themselves. I needed work, was handed work (albeit not what I expected), and now I'm gone for the next week or so.

So if you happen to be in North Dakota or Wisconsin over these next few days, come by and visit, and hey! maybe I'll sell you a tempur-pedic mattress! (I'm actually not 100% sure of what I'll be doing, just that I have to transport mattresses from a warehouse in Cali to a couple trade shows in the states listed above.)

Should be quite the adventure.

I want to be in America. Okay for me in America. Everything's free in America. For a small fee in America.

Friday, August 14, 2009


I really have no reason to complain. Things are falling into place slowly but surely, and for that I am forever grateful. I'm not in a place to find a full-time job where I can be hired by a company or anything while still in CA, but I'm still in desperate need of money. The good thing though, is that I know someone who has offered me some work for the time being. It'll mean I have to go on a week-long road trip to who knows where, but I'm definitely up for it! 

It's still tough though, I won't lie. I wonder though, how would things be any different if I weren't leaving? What would I be doing differently, anything? I would hope so. I would hope my drive and determination to make things happen would be just as steady. I would hope that I would take time and effort to build strong relationships with those around me. I would hope that life would be beautiful, and I would strive for greatness.

In the meantime, I know things won't go exactly as planned. There will be unexpected curves and turns and rough bumps and everything else one might encounter on this adventure we call life. I believe I'm ready for it though. I'm ready to face the unforeseen circumstances head on, so c'mon life, bring it.

You can't forget that no matter what happens, whatever goes wrong, there is a reason for it. There's a purpose to all these things. Grieve your losses and don't forget the price of it all. But know that somehow it all becomes worthwhile. There's always something to hope for.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

The Sun Also Rises

Sometimes I feel as if my deepest thoughts, if shared, will scare the people around me. Not that they're evil, or that they wish ill-will upon anyone, just that people seem to want you to be happy, and not in the least bit frustrated at life at certain times. We give off these vibes that say - I want you smiling all the time and I don't want anything you might say to bring an ache to my heart because I'm having a great day and my life is good. Maybe it's the way we were brought up, or we can relate it to something we learned in school or how someone hurt us in the past.

Maybe it's none of that. 

Sunday, in a way, was a day like this. I don't know what triggered it, or if there was any happenstance that caused my mood to automatically drop eighty degrees south. But all of a sudden I didn't want to be around the lovely people I was with. I wanted to go back home and sit in my messy room by myself, and hold some kind of idiotic pity party. I didn't, thankfully, but my attitude was still immediately noticed by most of everyone there. I told myself to snap out of it - and I did my best. I still don't think my best was good enough for the rest of the night though.

I know though, that it has to do a lot about this whole move. It's frustrating. It's difficult. And in complete honesty I'm scared crapless to see how it's all going to work out. I feel like I can't interact with people as I'd like to, because I'll be gone in slightly more than two months and they'll never care to talk to me again. Harsh? Let's face it - if "friends" aren't checking in on me and asking when they'll be able to see me again, why the hell would that change for the better if I'm 1,300 miles farther away? I feel like the time spent there, precious as what I have now, would amount to what...surfacy conversation?

Correct me if I'm wrong, because I know that there's some absolutely wrong reasoning there. I've talked over the whole friendship thing with a few friends, and it seems as if the conclusion always comes to the fact that if people aren't willing to take the time to see how life is treating you and how you're really doing, then why is there any reason to make an effort back. I'm not saying I don't try at all, and wait to see if anyone truly cares about me. No, I do take the time out of those I truly know will be friends with me forever, I just don't know how much effort I'm going to put into something that has no reciprocation. (Sidenote: Facebook tells me I have 780 friends. What an utter lie.)


I don't know what to do about all of this. It seems to be a lifelong process that only has one step forward for every three steps back. It's complicated, I know, but maybe, just maybe I'll be able to come to some sort of small conclusion that allows me peace of mind.

I believe the sun also rises, dries our tears, bringing the blue skies of day. I believe the sun also rises, lighting our paths, driving the darkness away.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Everywhere I Go

I probably shouldn't jump the gun on this one. I should probably wait until Friday to start writing about where my life is currently headed.

But do you ever feel something so strongly that you can't just sit and wait a whole 48 hours to share your excitement with the world?

I can sum it up in five words for you: I am moving to Texas.

There are so many stories behind those five words that one simple post cannot do it justice. So many life decisions, so many twists and turns and unexpected obstacles. But here I am, and in complete honesty:

I couldn't be happier.

For everywhere I go I see Your face through the crowd. Everywhere I go I hear Your voice clear and loud. Everywhere I go You are the light that I seek. Everywhere I go You have found me.